Tuesday, January 31, 2006


Yes folks, my new sextant arrived in the mail today. I'm in Sailing Geek Heaven. For nearly 300 years sailors have been using these to navigate by the sun, moon and stars. There's some tricky math but it's an intersting mental excercise which I'm sorely in need of. Besides it's like sailing, swordfighting, archery, martial arts and all that other old fashioned crap I'm so into. It's not a skill you're ever likely to need, but if you DO need it you REALLY FUCKING NEED IT. Here's the full scoop on sextants and celestial navigation: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sextant

Monday, January 30, 2006

The First 8.3% 0f 2006 Is Over!

I'd love to tell you all that I did this self portrait by hand, in ink and on the first try. Alas, I'm bound to confess to you that it was created at Mister PicassoHead which I highly recommend.
Nevertheless I'm fond of it. It captures how I imagine myself to look if I were a caricature of a famous Horny-As-Hell writer or artist type banging every slag who crossed my path. I think I needs a cigar though, preferrably properly seasoned by Monica Lewinsky. Maybe a tumbler of whiskey would help too? Hell, when WOULDN'T a tumbler of whiskey help? I ask you...

Thursday, January 26, 2006

New HNT!

That was approximately half of me. The back half. Happy HNT!

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Red Square

No, I'm not going to Moscow (um..yet). This is just the uncreative name I came up with for this new uncreative piece of "art" I just whipped up. I like it in spite of that. There's something familiar and friendly about it to me. I'm now inspired to do something with blue elipses but anyway... I've been having these weird vivid dreams lately, all of them very strange. I'll spare you the details but my subconcious is getting a workout. I took my first new HNT pic in a while. I think y'all gonna like it; at least I hope so.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Verizon Sucks

I have Verizon DSL. (Insert Rasberry Sound here). Now the access speed and such is OK, BUT, whenever there's a bad storm my router and Modem get reset and I have to call tech support. Being a disorganized fellow I can never find the directions to fix this that I wrote down LAST time OR the phone number I need to call to get it. So I have to call customer support because NOWHERE ON THEIR FUCKING WEBSITE IS THE ACTUAL TECH SUPPORT NUMBER I NEED! So I have to sit through an hour of automated awfulness to be hung up on at least twice everytime I call to get it. So I've been down for a week but of course I'll have to pay for the whole month. I'm in the tech biz. They should be able to fix this remotely from an email request from another location. "Oh you're down? Let me reset that for you. *click* Done!" But no. While I'm on the subject, their wireless service blows too. Oh it worked great in Manhattan (unless there was an actual emergency) but here in bumblefuck Westchester I drop every call I make or recieve at least once. If I walk from the cab to the curb forget about it.
They said it was my $30 phone (the one that worked like a charm in the city). Next cheapest phone? $250. "WHAT?!?!" "We promise the service will be better AND only $50 for the phone if you sign this two year contract." I'm desperate. I sign. Service is worse than ever. In summary VERIZON CAN SUCK MY BALLS and as soon as the contract is up I will ditch their slimy company and never use their services again just like I did with Sprint. You may say that has no effect but you know what? If every customer they fuck does that they will soon have no business. So fuck them running. Bah. Rant mode off.

Monday, January 23, 2006


All of Hugh Macleod's recent cartoons speak straight to my heart in a very painful way. That frightens me quite a bit. Spent the weekend working on my boat, Gala. She says "hello".

Friday, January 20, 2006

long weird fishtank dream post

I think I might have had this dream because of Blondie's fishtank blog which I was reading yesterday and one of who's fish is above. This morning I dreamed I had a room mate and it was his birthday. Who this guy was I dunno but he and his girlfriend were in "our" apartment celebrating his birthday and getting generally drunk. Someone had gotten him and large and expensive pair if fish tanks, one on top of the other and filled with beautiful tropical fish of all sorts. This was odd because there were several other large fish tanks around the apartment that were either empty or contained only water. Now it gets weird. He's not especially excited about the fish tanks and so he takes his other gift, some sort of weird laser-pointer-gun thing, and starts shooting at the floor of the upper fish tank until it melts through. Now the water and some fish are draining from the upper tank into the lower tank but it's clear the lower tank can't hold all the water and it's overflowing everywhere. He seems unconcerned, kind of laughing about it and I'm PISSED, yelling at him to help clean up the mess of all the water and help me save these fish. He is unconcerned and unimpressed. The water is buckling the floor beneath the fish tanks and the floor is all spongy and I'm thinking (and yelling) about the 50 odd gallons of water seeping into the downstairs neighbors apartment. Now I start trying to move the many various fish to the other tanks, worried that the shock of changing water will kill them (this is a concern with fishtanks). Some of the fish are way too large for the little gold fish net and I'm like, shoving these giant fish half way into the net and holding thier tails and to get them over into another tank. Why I didn't just put them all in the lower tank I dunno. Anyway as I'm shuttling the fish to the new tank I notice the water level going down considerably and I realize the back of the tank is coming off! Oh crap! Now I have to move all these fish AGAIN! By this time the water level in both tanks containing fish is so low that they're flapping around in the sand completely unable to breathe and I'm freaking out, shaking them off and dropping them in yet another tank. Some are recovering but not all and it becomes clear we're going to lose a lot of fish and that there's going to be A TON of water damage to the apartment and then I more or less woke up feeling all stressed. There were some mighty weird fish I might add. The strangest thing was the...cow-ish...fish. It was like a miniature blue cow but it breathed water. There was also a big assed trout about 15 inches long and an Oscar like the one in the pic and lots of various little goldfish and fish fish fish fish fish! FISH.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

How I Rolls HNT

My other ride is a hot blonde. Hope y'all enjoyed the best blonde joke ever, below. Actually, it's a Packard. As in "I Packered in my Rolls, jumped on the blonde and RODE." Or sumpum' like that.
Beep Beep, M, Beep Beep YEAH!

Monday, January 16, 2006

Super Freaky

I wrote Saturday how I dreamed that My Future Wife and I had twin girls named Stasha and Tasha. That is Anastasia and Natasha. I didn't think anything of it though it was a pleasant dream and that in itself is rather odd in light of my former views on having children. We were happy; overjoyed in fact. Today, on a whim, I looked up the names. The hair on the back of my neck stood up. Anastasia means "Resurrection". Natasha means "Rebirth". Whoa. Twin girls named Resurrection and Rebirth? Considering my recent return to the church that's especially freaky. What's going on here with my subconscious? There are no coincidences and I know for sure I never knew what those names meant. Insert Twilight Zone theme here. Weird.

Saturday, January 14, 2006


Owls and Eagles and Falcons, oh my! Here I am with Athena the Banded Owl. Her name was Mercury until she laid an egg. Apparently these critters can be hard to sex. (Insert joke here) Tonight was my Intro to Raptor Handling class at Teatown Lake Reservation. Absolutely AWESOME!!! We learned a lot about raptors, which are birds that seize their prey with their talons. The woman, Deanna, who took this pitcure for me said I looked "noble". I want a new tattoo for the bare right arm. This bird and I had an instant connection. She liked me and said so with her eyes. The handlers expressed surprise that I knew so much about the birds and asked me if I'd handled before. In my usual fashion I studied up quite a bit and used the terminology comfortably. Even so I learned quite a bit and took extensive notes. I plan to join the club and undergo the complex training involved in maintaining these beautiful creatures. It requires a one year, once a week, commitment. I'm ready. What is it with me and commitment lately? Athena is the only bird that wasn't injured. She was an illegal pet seizure. (Insert joke here) Raptors are extensively protected and regulated at the federal and local levels. To quote Strongbad "I've a passing interest in falconry." Actually hunting with these beautiful animals must be quite an experience. I may go on a hunt. These guys don't do that. They're strictly preservation. I'm generally opposed to hunting with a gun but this is something else again. An ancient skill like sailing that must be preserved. I visited Gala today and did some work on her. Very much looking forward to the sailing season. In other unrelated news I dreamed last night that my future wife and I had twin girls and their names were Stasha and Tasha. That is Anastasia and Natasha. Good dream. Things are going well. I thank God. I look forward to church tomorrow.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Blast From The Past and HNT

Not the most flattering picture of me but it IS summer time, it IS on my boat, Gala. This is really an after thought shot. I haven't been much inclined to take or post anything at all but I hate to let y'all down as I do love seeing you all here. SPECIAL SHOUTOUT to one of my oldest and dearest friends who's been reading for a couple of weeks and finally got 'round to saying hello. Please give a warm welcome to Screen Name Boycott! Hey! The crowd goes wild! Hopefully I'll be posting some of SNB's lovely writing sometime soon. Must get permission first. Meantime go to the previous post and make with the clicky on the linkys. Lovely new tunesies for your lovely little earsies. Moresies to comesies. My God, where are my meds? Cheers! I go to fight a ticket. Hopefully I won't wind up in jail. it was JUST a STOP SIGN! Geez!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

New Song

OK, I have 9 songs for the new release. I think I need three more. I'm never satisfied with anything. I hear all the little mistakes writ large. They're all really demos but still...
Today's new song is first. Give a listen, leave a comment, enjoy.
Love's 2 Dangerous - new
Fiddler's Green
Brenda's Song
You Back Down - remixed
C'est Fini
Pictures To Prove It

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The great unknown

The audition went well. I showed up early and the guy who was supposed to be before me didn't show up. Therefore instead of a half hour I got in about 90 minutes of serious jamming. It was really fun. 90% of life is showing up! When the handsome and talented black singer and leader of the band said "You got soul brother." I felt great. Can their be any higher praise? I am a funk soul brother! Check it out now! OK, I'm over it. It was a great time. Let' s hope it pans out.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

More new songs

I'm really happy with the way Castaway came out.
Pictures To Prove It
Brenda's Song -
You Back Down
Fiddler's Green
C'est Fini
Much love to you my friends and thanks for listening. Please vote for your favorite.
Anyone have any thoughts on song order for the full CD? More to come...

Friday, January 06, 2006

Avast! Shanghaied!

Well, I'm auditioning Sunday here in New York for a 3 month residence at The House Of Blues.
In ShangHai China as a bass player for a funk/blues band. The Details: Carlton Smith at The House of Blues Shanghai - 6 nights a week (monday's off) - 3 45-minute sets a night - standard funk & blues. James brown, brick house, mustang sally, etc... $600 US per week, cash. A little more than half what I'd make at my current job. My own hotel room and travel accomodations, all expenses paid. March 1st - May 30th. They have to decide by next week. I sense a whirlwind brewing. I wonder if I can ride it? I'd be in Shanghai on my birthday Mar. 1st. In fact, if I have this right, my birthday will be 36 hours long. It would be a 12 hour journey during which I gain 12 hours. I'd leave at 8 AM and arrive in China at 8AM the same day. Weird. Wish me luck. That would certainly take my mind off my current problems. I know a little Chinese. That'd improve it quick. Ni hao Shang Hai! BTW I added two new songs to the 4 already in Monday's post below.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

HNT & New Music

I was too bummed to take a new HNT pic. I was busy writing & recording the songs below. Have a listen to the mp3's and have your hankies ready. My fave is Fiddler's Green's, which is a sailor's term for Heaven, Davy Jones' locker being hell/a watery grave. This is the tattoo Brenda got for me. My permanent reminder of her temporary feeling.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

New Songs

These MP3s take 15 to 30 seconds to download on my DSL line.
Brenda's Song - the best love song I ever wrote.
You Back Down - a musical history of the loss of the love of my life.
Dumped - which pretty much says it all.
Fiddler's Green -A very Irish sounding ballad, sad and sweet.
C'est Fini - Don't say it's over, 'cause it ain't over
Footsteps - You make my footsteps firm. With God everything is possible.
Much love to you my friends and thanks for listening. Please vote for your favorite.

All songs copyright Andy Toomey 2005

Monday, January 02, 2006

A New Leaf

Black trees of pain. I've been posting way too much about lost love and giving way too much detail. For a while I'm going to say what I have to say with art and music. With God everything is possible. If the pain leads me back to God it has served God and I'm grateful for it. I'm becoming a regular God Junky. I'll take it.

Sunday, January 01, 2006


Well the new year is off to a mighty strange start. I woke up this morning and did something extremely uncharateristic of me. I went to church. Let me tell you, THAT'S desperation. I got thinking about it last night and it was the first (OK the second) thing on my mind when I woke up. I threw on some clothes and drove to St Augustine's. It's right next to where Brenda lives. Yes she goes there (very rarely) with her girlfriend/neighbor that I know she was out with last night. Lest you think I'm stalking her I didn't go there to see her. I went to talk to God. In person, so to speak. Was I secretly hoping she might be there and see me? Probably, although frankly I wouldn't have wanted her to see what I did. I cried like a baby. I walked in about 10 minutes before Mass (I luckily guessed it was at 10AM). I sat about halfway down in the back and lost it. It's pretty hard to cry hysterically and still be quiet but I did a pretty good job. I got down on my knees and cried my eyes out (something I hadn't really been able to do before) and begged God to please give me the strength to make it through this and, if it His will to Please, Dear God, please bring back my Brenda to me. Amen. I haven't been a practicing catholic since I was about 10.
A funny thing:I made it through the service without any major fuckups I guess, except that I forgot that when it's time for communion you walk up there whether you're taking communion or not. Since I hadn't gone to confession I couldn't take communion. That way everyone goes back to their seats in the same order. I just sat there and people had to skootch by me. I would have laughed if I weren't crying so hard. I felt bad when it was time to shake everyone's hand (the 'peace be with you' thing). Firstly, it was clear that peace was not with me and secondly both hands were covered in tears and snot. Whatever, they shook my hand anyway.
I kept crying for a while in the car after we left. Finally I was all cried out. Strange thing though; I was hungry afterward for the first time in 5 days. That's good because I was pretty much starving myself to death. Since I can't smoke or drink anymore food will have to come back into play.

I guess after the greif stage comes the rage stage. Stay tuned for bitter vitriol.